Is Your "Woke Bae" Really That Woke?

You thought you found the perfect match, but is your date really as woke as they seem? It's important to keep an eye out for red flags that might indicate otherwise. From subtle comments about gender roles to a lack of awareness about social issues, there are plenty of signs to watch out for. Don't ignore the warning signs, and stay informed about what to look for in a potential partner. For more on navigating the dating world, check out this article.

Dating in the 21st century comes with its own set of challenges, and one of them is trying to navigate through the world of "woke baes." These are the guys who claim to be socially aware, politically conscious, and all-around woke individuals. They talk the talk, but do they really walk the walk? Here are 15 signs that the guy you're dating might not be as woke as he thinks he is.

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1. Lack of Intersectional Awareness

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One of the key aspects of being woke is understanding the intersectionality of social issues. If your guy only focuses on one aspect of social justice and ignores the rest, it's a red flag. True wokeness involves acknowledging and addressing the interconnected nature of oppression.

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2. Tokenism

Does your guy only have one or two friends who are from marginalized communities? Does he constantly bring up their race, gender, or sexual orientation in an attempt to showcase his "wokeness"? This behavior is a form of tokenism and is a clear sign that he's more concerned with looking woke than actually being an ally.

3. Performative Activism

Posting a black square on Instagram or attending a protest for the photo op doesn't make someone woke. True activism involves consistent and meaningful action, not just a one-time show of support.

4. Lack of Education on Social Issues

Being woke means being informed about social issues and their historical context. If your guy can't hold a conversation about systemic racism, sexism, or LGBTQ+ rights beyond surface-level talking points, his wokeness might be more of an act than a genuine commitment.

5. Disregard for Consent

Wokeness should extend to all aspects of life, including relationships. If your guy doesn't prioritize consent and respect in your interactions, his so-called wokeness is merely a facade.

6. Centering Himself in Conversations About Oppression

Does your guy constantly make discussions about social issues all about him? True wokeness involves amplifying the voices of marginalized communities, not making it all about his feelings and experiences.

7. Fetishizing Marginalized Identities

If your guy has a habit of romanticizing or fetishizing people from marginalized communities, it's a clear sign that he doesn't truly understand the struggles they face.

8. Ignoring Calls to Action

When it comes to social justice, actions speak louder than words. If your guy is quick to talk about important issues but hesitates to take real action when the opportunity arises, his wokeness might not run as deep as he claims.

9. Defensive Attitude

A truly woke individual is open to learning, growing, and being called out. If your guy gets defensive or dismissive when confronted with his own privilege or problematic behavior, it's a sign that his wokeness is fragile at best.

10. Lack of Empathy

Empathy is a key component of being woke. If your guy struggles to empathize with the experiences of others, especially those from marginalized communities, his wokeness is questionable.

11. Disregard for Mental Health

Being woke involves understanding the impact of systemic oppression on mental health. If your guy dismisses or minimizes the mental health struggles of others, he's missing a crucial aspect of true wokeness.

12. Inconsistent Support for Marginalized Communities

True wokeness involves consistent support for marginalized communities, not just when it's convenient or trendy. If your guy's support seems to waver depending on the situation, his commitment to social justice is questionable.

13. Lack of Understanding of Privilege

A woke individual recognizes their own privilege and uses it to uplift and support others. If your guy struggles to acknowledge his privilege or uses it to his advantage without considering the impact on others, his wokeness is suspect.

14. Gaslighting and Manipulation

Using woke language to manipulate or gaslight others is a common tactic of performative allies. If your guy uses his wokeness as a shield to avoid accountability or manipulate your feelings, it's a major red flag.

15. Dismissal of Feminism

True wokeness includes a deep understanding and support for feminism. If your guy dismisses feminism or shows a lack of respect for women's rights, his wokeness is definitely in question.

In conclusion, being woke is more than just a label or a performance. It requires genuine understanding, empathy, and consistent action. If the guy you're dating exhibits any of these signs, it might be time to reassess his level of wokeness and consider whether he truly aligns with your values. After all, true wokeness goes beyond words and appearances – it's about making a real difference in the world.